


Reylo One Shots

by Aramenialys



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: AUs, F/M, Taking Suggestions, canonverse, one shots, reylo family
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-27
Updated: 2018-12-08
Packaged: 2018-12-20 03:49:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 16,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11912595
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aramenialys/pseuds/Aramenialys
Summary: Reylo one shots. Mostly one shots from my head, probably, but requests for prompts are also accepted.





	1. Puddle Jumper

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was a dark and stormy night...and it was the first one Ara had ever experienced. Let's just say your first thunderstorm is more than a little bit terrifying.
> 
> One shot about Ben and Rey's daughter and her first thunderstorm experience. 
> 
> (Modern AU)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I've had these in the writing bin for awhile, but haven't posted any of them. Needless to say, there are more to come, but this one was decidedly one of my favorites. I hope you guys fall in love with the little girl OC, Ara, because I certainly have. 
> 
> Please, enjoy!

“Daddy?”

Ara. Ara’s voice. He must have been dreaming. It was too early for her to be awake. It was _far_ too early for _him_ to be awake.

“D - Daddy?”

This Dream Ara was persistent. He wished it would stop. He was exhausted. If he got anxious enough, he’d probably wake up, and his little girl calling for him would certainly drive his anxiety level upward.

“Daddy!”

Ben’s eyes flew open. Two small hands tugged at his own. Ara was really in the room, really calling his name.

“Daddy, wake up, _wake up!”_

He rolled over carefully, taking pains to ensure he didn’t wake his wife sleeping peacefully beside him. For some reason, Ara had not gone to her, though she usually did, and he wasn’t going to wake her up this time, as much as he wanted to.

He blinked slowly a couple of times before his daughter came into focus beside their bed. Her eyes were wide with fear and tears glistened in them. Though he was still unsure around Ara, he knew that when she wanted comfort, she was easy to please.

That didn’t mean it was easy for him to be pleasing.

He reached a hand out to comfort her, but drew it away quickly as he didn’t know if that would make it better or worse. Still half asleep, he tried to pass it off as though he’d reached up to run a hand through his mussed hair. “Ara, sweetheart, whasswrong?” he slurred. “It’s still dark outside...wh-what are you doing awake?”

He got his answer when a clap of thunder shot through the still air. Ara hiccupped and tears came to her eyes once more, spilling over onto her cheeks.

 _“Oh_ _.”_

She was only three years old, and this would be the first thunderstorm she’d remember. She didn’t know what the loud noises shaking the house were, and she was terrified.

“Come here, Starlight.”

She ran to him and Ben picked her up, holding her awkwardly, but close nonetheless. She wrapped her arms tightly around his neck and buried her face in his shoulder. After a few minutes without too much fuss, Ben managed to relax. He shifted so her positioning was less awkward and even ran a tentative hand through her short curls.

“You’re okay, Ara. It’s okay.”

Thunder rumbled loudly again, and Ara whimpered. Ben found that his body and instincts took over, and he didn’t even have to think about what to do. His arms tightened around her.

“I’m scared, Daddy,” she whispered. “What’s that noise?”

“It’s just thunder. It can’t hurt you, I promise.”

She nestled her head in the crook of his neck. “I don’t like it very much.”

It was silent for a moment. Then quietly, “How about we go back to sleep, then? So we don’t have to hear it?”

Ara clung to him tighter. “Daddy, no! No, I don’t want to go back to my bed! I don’t want to be alone!”

“Okay. Okay, shh....okay, I didn’t mean that you had to go back to your bed, Starlight, that’s not what I meant. You can sleep in here with Mommy and I, if you want. I doubt she’d mind.”

Ara nodded. Ben set her down on the bed next to him and scooted over, pulling up the covers so Ara could kick her feet underneath them. As soon as she was situated, he lay down himself. To his surprise, Ara huddled into his chest, clenching his t-shirt in her fists and curling into a ball. After he recovered from his surprise, he wrapped his arms around her and continued stroking her curls. Thunder rumbled again, closer this time.

“Daddy…”

“It’s okay, Ara.”

“It’s so _loud…”_ she mumbled.

“I know…” Ben mumbled into her hair, “I know.”

She shifted a little before muttering, “I’m scared of funderstorms.”

Ben had to fight to keep from chuckling. “I used to be afraid of them, too.”

Ara wriggled out of his arms and looked up at him, her eyes wide, almost like she couldn’t believe her ears. “Really?”

Ben nodded. “Oh, yes. They terrified me. They were dark and loud and long. I couldn’t ever sleep when it rained. But then your grandma made it easier for me to get through them. She made them less scary.”

“How?”

“Well...she showed me the puddles that the rain made. She would jump around in them with me after the storms, and eventually, I came to enjoy the thunderstorms because I couldn’t wait to play in the puddles.”

Lightning flashed, illuminating the room. Ben knew what was coming before it happened, and he quickly hugged her head tighter to him, trying to cover her little ears so the thunder would be muffled. This time, it was so loud the house shook. Ara jumped at the sound.

“I’m still scared, Daddy,” she whimpered.

Ben kissed the top of her head. “I’m right here. It’s okay.”

Even as she shivered, she whispered his words back to him. “You’re right here. S’okay.”

“That’s right.”

Rain started pitter-pattering off the windows, calming in contrast to the rolls of thunder. Ara noticeably calmed in Ben’s arms, her grip on his shirt loosening.

“Do we have any puddles I can jump in?” she asked after a short while.

“Tomorrow. There will be plenty of puddles when the rain’s over.”

She was quiet for a moment as she thought it over. “I wanna do that.”

Ben smiled. “Sounds good to me.”

Thunder rumbled outside once again, but this time, Ara simply took a few deep breaths before composing herself. Ben rubbed his hand gently up and down her back.

“See? Look how brave you’re being already.”

She shook her head. “I’m only brave c-bause you’re here, Daddy. I’m only brave c-bause I know that you’ll take care of me. I’ll never be as brave as you. I just know that you’ll be there.”

At first, Ben said nothing. He didn’t know what to say. A feeling he still wasn’t quite used to had blossomed in his chest. A warmth that had only made itself present in the years since Ara was born. Even though it was unfamiliar and scared him a little bit, it was the feeling he found he enjoyed most in his life.

Ara took a deep breath in and yawned, and Ben, suddenly overcome with emotion at her words and what they implied, kissed the top of her hair once again. “Don’t you ever forget that, either. Know that whenever you need me to be brave for you, I’ll be brave for you. I’ll always be here, okay? Always.”

He waited, but got no response; Ara was already sound asleep. He smiled, “Goodnight, Ara. See you in the morning."

* * *

The next morning when Ben woke up, he was surprised to find that he’d risen before Ara. The little girl was curled into a ball, the sheets pulled up around her tiny shoulders, her head resting on Ben’s bicep. Her mouth was hanging open and soft snores could be heard. Ben smiled, gently pressing a kiss to her forehead. He brushed a curl away from her face and her eyelids fluttered. She yawned widely before opening them. She grinned sleepily. Ben grinned right back.

“Good morning, Daddy.”

“Good morning, Ara.”

She rubbed her eyes with a small fist. “Can we go jump in puddles now?”

* * *

“Alright,” Ben said, zipping up his jacket, “checklist time. Do you have your coat?”

Ara held out her arms and looked at them both solemnly before beaming up at him. “Yep!”

“Hat?”

She patted her head, giggling. “Uh-huh!”

“Boots?”

Ara paused. “Uh…” She glanced down at her socked feet. “One second!”

She ran to the front door to retrieve her rain boots and came back with them quickly, plopping herself on the floor to put them on. Ben noticed her struggling to put her right foot into her left shoe. Chuckling, he knelt next to her, gently moving her boot from her right foot to her left. She grinned sheepishly up at him.

“Oops.”

She hurriedly tugged the other boot on then jumped up and ran for the door. Ben grabbed the note he’d written for Rey in case she got up before they returned and taped it to the door before opening it for Ara.

“You ready?”

She nodded and raced outside. Ben followed, shutting the door firmly behind him.

Fall was coming in nicely. There were wet leaves piled everywhere, brown and orange and red hues decorating the sidewalk. It was still rather gloomy, but the promise of a new day made everything a little less so. Ara searched around for puddles on the sidewalk as they walked to the park at the end of their street, Ben walking a little ways behind her so she had some space to explore. He caught sight of a sizeable puddle a few yards away from where Ara was crouched down observing a worm that had wandered out onto the sidewalk.

“Starlight, I see one, a big one, right over there.”

She glanced up at him, her eyes wide in excitement. “Where?”

He pointed, and her head whipped around so fast her curls hit her in the face. A bright smile appeared on her lips and she stood up and sprinted towards it, almost tripping and falling on the slick sidewalk. Ben’s stomach did a little flip like it usually did when she was mere seconds from disaster, but Ara righted herself and kept running.

“Careful, Ara!”

“Sorry, Daddy!”

She didn't sound very sorry. Ben chuckled to himself, sticking his hands in his pockets to keep them warm. He watched with a smile as Ara raced to puddle, giggling. She looked around for a minute after she arrived before her face lit up and she bent over to retrieve a large stick. She brought it back to the puddle and dragged it across the top, creating ripples. Her eyes lit up and Ben couldn't keep his smile from growing. After awhile, she dropped the stick and stomped through the small pool, splattering her boots and the bottom of her jacket with muddy water. She looked back at him wearing a giant grin and his stomach dropped. He knew exactly what was coming next.

“Come jump with me, Daddy!”

He sighed. How could he say no? He couldn't bear to be the thing that wiped that smile off her face. She grabbed his hand when he reached her, and together they walked down the sidewalk, hand in hand. He humored her, kicking through the puddles as she clomped her way across them. Each little giggle drew her further and further away from the fear of last night until Ben was sure she'd forgotten it. But this...this she'd be able to remember.

Eventually, Ara’s nose and cheeks turned pink, and Ben decided it was time to go home.

“Don't want you catching a cold. You have school tomorrow. Your mother would kill me.”

She sighed. “Ok.”

Still, her mood seemed to have improved immensely.

“Daddy,” she said as she skipped along behind him. “I can't wait for the next funderstorm.”

She beamed up at him and he grinned right back. It felt good to have done something right.

They rounded the corner to their house and Ben was not surprised to see Rey sitting on their porch swing, coffee in hand. She was still wearing her pajamas but had wrapped herself in his bathrobe. As soon as she saw the both of them, a sleepy grin wound across her face and she waved.

“Mommy!” Ara shouted, running towards her mother. “Guess what I just did!”

Rey’s eyes widened and Ben laughed aloud as Ara barreled up the porch steps, muddy boots and all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked! 
> 
> I am taking requests for story ideas with these characters and probably others, in case anyone's interested. These aren't going to be in any order or connected at all unless I indicate otherwise. They can be AUs or canonverse, either one. I figured I'd post this so I'd have something to write when my multichap A Fine Line is giving me trouble. 
> 
> Thank you for reading!


	2. Away from Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes taking care of a baby isn't all it's cracked up to be. Especially when you've never done it before.
> 
> One shot about Rey taking care of an infant Ara.
> 
> (Canonverse.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alrighty, just to clarify; do I see these two getting married, settling down, and having a child? No. Absolutely not. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if one of them (probably Kylo) didn't make it out of the next couple of movies. But a girl can dream. And though I'd be disappointed if they just all of a sudden made up and everything was fine in canon, their eventual happiness is what my dreams are made of. 
> 
> Enjoy!

Rey sighed down at her soiled shirt, her daughter’s cries blaring in her ears.

“Oh, Ara…”

She just wished she could catch a break. Her husband had been absent for a few weeks and would be gone for the remainder of this one, and her infant daughter had decided she wasn’t going to sleep. She’d been up late into the night every night, and up early every morning. The lack of rest was taking its toll.

Rey frantically searched for the rag she’d used to clean up after Ara the first several times, but when she couldn’t find it, she gave up and used Ara’s blanket; it wasn’t like it didn’t already have spit-up on it. She was too tired to care that it did. She’d just go get another one when Ara decided to sleep again.

To say she was jealous of her husband at the moment was a gross understatement. She loved her daughter dearly, in fact, more than she’d ever loved anyone, but she’d give anything for a full night of sleep at this point, and she knew that was exactly what Ben was getting. Off sleeping in some luxury suite for visitors of the Senate, he was probably living the dream. Waking up to meet with the members to talk about opening more Jedi academies was probably a walk in the park compared to the life Rey was living right now.

"It’s not like you’ve never struggled in your life, Rey."

Oh, but this seemed so much harder than scavenging.

To be fair, it wasn’t so bad in the daytime. Ara was amiable during the day, and as tired as Rey was, each little smile let her know that it was all worth it. But when bedtime rolled around...well, bedtime just didn’t exist. Ara would _scream_ if Rey left the cradle, and she would lie awake for hours, staring up at nothing and cooing. Even when she seemed to be in a good mood, she’d wail when Rey moved out of her line of vision. And tonight, the one night she’d fallen asleep in a reasonable amount of time, she’d woken up an hour later spitting up and running a small fever. Rey had taken her to the medbay, and a med droid had given her an antibiotic to feed to Ara with her next bottle. Ara’s fever had broken soon after she’d taken it, but she spit up the entire bottle, and was now crying louder than she had been before.

To be quite honest, Rey was on the verge of tears herself.

She gently rocked her daughter back and forth, patting her back with one hand and groping around for her pacifier on the nightstand behind her with the other. “Shh...don’t cry, little one,” she cooed. “Don’t cry. It’s okay. You’re okay. Please don’t cry.”

Ara continued to wail. Rey sighed, giving up her search for the missing pacifier. She took a deep breath, forcing down the helpless sob that rose up in the back of her throat.

“Ara, love, you have to stop crying. If you don’t, Mommy will cry, too, and then we’ll be a real mess.” Of course, this didn't change a blessed thing. "Why am I such a failure?" she whispered to herself.

_Ben, why can’t you just hurry up and come home?_

She tried putting Ara back in her crib, but of course that made nothing better. Ara continued to cry. Rey switched her positioning so her head was on Rey’s shoulder, and she attempted to burp the agitated infant. Not even a small change.

Behind her, lightning flashed and rain began to pour in sheets, pounding against the windows as thunder rumbled in the distance. Rey couldn’t believe this was happening.

Ara went silent for a moment before she erupted into sobs again. Rey finally let the tears she’d been holding back loose. “Perfect!” she shouted at the window. “Just wonderful! Thank you _so_ much!”

Suddenly:

_Hang in there, sweetheart. It’ll be okay. I’ll be home soon._

She froze, almost dropping Ara in surprise. The words echoed around in her head, and she realized with a jolt it had to be their bond. Relief spread through her entire being, hope nipping at its heels.

'Ben?'

The bond had been relatively weak during her pregnancy, Ara’s Force signature seeming to disrupt the signal with its strength. After she’d been born, it had still been shaky, and worried, they’d asked if it would ever return to where it had been. They were told that, yes, it would, but it would take time. She guessed it really was getting stronger.

'Ben, is that you? Please, say it’s you. Please, say I’m not going crazy-'

_You aren’t going crazy._

She could feel his amusement like a spark through their bond. Rey could have cried tears of mirth. Ara must have sensed the change in her mother’s mood, because she, though still quite loud, became quieter. She was no longer screaming. Even that was a welcome relief.

'You can hear me?'

_Loud and clear._

Stars, she’d missed this. This closeness she’d had with Ben that no one else in the galaxy had ever had with him. She could hear his every thought, could feel his very emotions, could see his memories almost reflexively. She let her end of the bond fly open, and when she did, she could feel everything again, almost exactly at the strength it had been before.

'Thank the stars. How did you know you could-?'

_I didn’t. It just...happened, I guess._

'And at quite an opportune time.'

Ara was continually quieting as Rey’s mood improved, but she still continued to fuss. Rey didn’t know what else to do. She sighed, placing a kiss on the top of her daughter’s head.

'Can you come home early? Your daughter got your ‘holy terror’ trait.'

She felt a flash of amusement. It was certainly not from her end. Ara was still very much upset, and Rey did not yet see the light at the end of the tunnel.

'You think I’m being funny.'

_No, sweetheart, I know you’re being perfectly serious. That’s what’s so amusing. But I do wish I could come home. I miss both of you so much. I’ll be home soon, though._

'Not soon enough.'

_I know._

The bond went silent for awhile as they both simply took in the other’s presence. Settling back into everything they’d missed in the past months. Rey juggled her focus from her thoughts to her crying daughter and back again, but even the brief moments in her husband’s presence were enough to calm her, at least. She came across a spark of anticipation and latched onto it, trying to decipher it.

'Ben? What’s this?'

She sat down in her rocking chair, gently patting Ara’s back in an attempt to calm her down enough to sleep. There was a small pause before Ben responded, his words flying into her head so fast it was all she could do to understand them.

_The case is closing a day early. Everyone’s been invited to stay the extra day to enjoy themselves, but I’m leaving as soon as the meeting lets out._

The words took a moment to register. But finally, they did, and with them-

_I’ll be home tomorrow, Rey._

She positively beamed. She looked down at her daughter who was now very confused by her mother’s change in attitude. She displayed this confusion by wailing for a moment then stopping then starting again.

“Daddy’s coming home early, Ara.”

'Ben, that’s amazing!'

_I’ll be back before you’re asleep._

Rey sighed but offered a small, humorless chuckle.

'That won’t exactly be a challenge; I don’t get to sleep anymore.'

A pang of guilt. Then, one from her end.

'It’s not your fault, Ben.'

_It doesn’t matter. Tomorrow night, I’ll make sure you sleep. I’ll stay up with her all night if I have to._

'Believe me, you’ll have to.'

She looked down at her daughter, whose eyes were now drifting closed.

'But that sounds wonderful.'

Once again, guilt that was not her own rolled through her conscious, and she frowned.

'Ben, what’s the matter with you? You’re coming home tomorrow, a day early, and giving up a day you could’ve had to yourself, to give me a full night’s rest, what could you possibly be feeling guilty about?'

_I feel bad for leaving you alone in the first place._

'It’s not like I haven’t left _you_ alone before.'

 _It’s different, though. Even when I’m home, I feel like you’re the one doing most of the caretaking. I feel like I’m never there with you. Like I’m never there_ for _you. Like I’m just_ never there.

Rey took a deep breath. How so very… _him._ Of course he would try and take all the blame. There was nothing that happened that wasn’t his fault.

'Ben, don’t do that. I don’t blame you for any of this. This is normal. Ask any mother, I’m sure they will all tell you the exact same thing: taking care of a baby means little to no sleep. It’s rare that the man helps, though it would be much appreciated, but, _you_ _do_ help. Sometimes, you can’t though. And that’s okay.

'And sure, you’re gone a lot now…'

Another harsh flash of guilt.

'...but that’s _just now._ Someday, the roles will be reversed, and you’ll be the one to take care of her.'

A long pause, and Rey could tell he was mulling over her words.

_What if I’m gone so much she doesn’t know who I am?_

'Oh, my...'

Rey rolled her eyes, shaking her head. She glanced down at her half-conscious daughter. “Your father is a very silly man. Incredibly dramatic.”

'That will _not_ happen.'

_I meant worst-case scenario!_

'Even for a worst-case scenario, love, that’s a bit extreme.'

_Maybe._

'Probably.'

_Still, I just wish I was home more._

Rey was slow with her answer.

'I know.'

It was now blissfully silent, both in their bond and in the room, which could only mean one thing: Ara was finally asleep. Rey very carefully stood up and walked across the room, setting the infant in her crib. By some miracle, she stayed asleep. Rey closed her eyes and smiled.

_I assume she’s asleep?_

Rey shuffled back to their bed and flung herself on it, throwing an arm over her face.

'How’d you figure?'

Muffled amusement wound its way lazily through the bond.

_The tension that was overpowering any and all other emotion in the bond has come to an abrupt end._

Rey let out a weak chuckle.

'Yes, she’s asleep.'

_Good._

'Very good.'

_...I love you._

Rey smiled softly.

'I love you, too.'

He didn’t say anything else, but Rey knew he hadn’t left. She could still feel him there, enjoying her presence as she was enjoying his. Suddenly, exhaustion rolled over her in waves, and Rey knew it wasn’t just hers.

'I think it might be time for you to go to sleep, Mr. Bigshot Jedi. Don’t want you falling asleep during your final meeting tomorrow.'

_No! No, I’m fine. It’s okay, really, I’m fine. I’ll be fine._

'Ben, it’s-'

_I don’t want to leave you alone again, Rey._

Rey shook her head.

'Ben, you won’t be leaving me alone, okay? I’m going to try and sleep some, too.'

_Are you sure?_

'I’m positive, Ben.'

When there was no response, she drove her point home.

'Goodnight, Ben. I love you.'

 _Goodnight, Rey._ _I love you, too._

Rey kicked up the covers and burrowed under them, not even bothering to change her shirt. Honestly, she couldn’t be bothered. She’d have to wash everything tomorrow, regardless; Ara had managed to spit up on everything she came into contact with.

A tiny gurgle sounded from the crib and Rey froze.

“Please, no. _Please, no.”_

She heard shifting and her heart sank, but then stillness. Silence. A soft sigh. Then Ara was asleep again.

“Thank the Force.”

She rolled over, ready to go to sleep, but something else was bugging her. She rolled her eyes.

'Ben. Go to sleep.'

There was alarm as Ben realized he’d been caught, and she chuckled.

_Sorry._

'Goodnight, Ben.'

_Goodnight, Rey._

'See you tomorrow.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed! Please, feel free to leave a prompt if you have one. I'll do my best to fill it.
> 
> For those of you also reading A Fine Line, I promise I'm working on it. There should be an update soon, so be on the lookout.
> 
> Thank you for reading!


	3. Timing is Everything

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kayla needs answers, and she needs them now. Ray seems to be the only one able to give them to her. 
> 
> (Modern Genderbent AU)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I've been scarce for quite awhile, but hopefully this'll make up for it. This is my first request fill, and I hope you all like it! Thank you to ObeliskX over on fanfiction.net for the prompt. 
> 
> Please enjoy!

Kayla almost couldn’t believe how easy this was going to be. It was _too_ easy. In fact, it felt like it was being handed to her on a silver platter. This man had no idea what she was actually here for, no idea what the future held for him. He didn’t seem suspicious of her at all, though she was sure he was a little bewildered by her knowledge, or lack thereof, of the parts in his store.

_Poor, gullible, unsuspecting boy. Won’t even see what’s coming to him._

He shortly returned to the counter carrying the parts she’d said she needed. Kayla immediately shifted her face into the unassuming mask of innocence she’d assumed when she’d first walked in.

He plunked them down on the counter, revealing his tan, grease-spotted face wearing a strained smile. He was definitely confused by her order. Kayla wasn’t surprised. She was sure she’d asked for nonsense. She didn’t care. It wasn’t what she was looking for.

“Here you go. Just what you asked for.” He laughed awkwardly. “Though what you asked for...I’m not sure how exactly you’ll be using all these things.”

Her smile quickly changed and she flung her hand back towards the door, slamming it shut and locking it without ever laying a finger on its surface. She turned back to the man at the counter whose eyes were wide. He stared between her and the door for a few moments before his eyes narrowed. “How did you-?”

“You know what’s happening to me, don’t you? That’s why you aren’t running away screaming. You know what this is.”

His face whirled through numerous different emotions, finally landing on a passive expression. “Not a clue. Just not the type to scare easily, is all.”

“Liar,” Kayla spat.

“Me?” the man smirked. “Never.”

Kayla offered him a smirk of her own. “I guess we’ll find out, won’t we?”

His smile quickly fell, fear sparking in his eyes. “What?”

Kayla flicked her wrist and his eyes rolled back in his head. He crumpled, unconscious. She smiled. “Nighty-night.”

* * *

Ray’s eyes flew open. He tried looking around, but it was dark in every direction. His wrists and ankles were tied down, but he wasn’t gagged.

“Hello?” he called, pulling against the ropes tying him to the chair. “Is anybody here?”

Suddenly, a light above his head clicked on. He squinted against the sudden brightness, his eyes watering in protest. The girl from the shop strode into his line of vision, but he’d heard the heavy thud of her boots on the concrete floor before he’d seen her. She smiled at him, but this smile was much less innocent than the ones she’d flashed him before. Shoving her hands in her pockets, she stepped up close to him, much closer than he deemed necessary. She leaned forward, and now she was so close he could smell the leather on her jacket and the shampoo in her hair.

“You know what’s happening to me,” she said in a low voice.

“What? How could I - I don’t even _know_ you!”

She drew away, shaking her head. “You can’t lie to me.”

Ray swallowed. Did she know what he could do? What he was? He barely knew, himself.

“Who are you?”

The girl shifted her weight into one hip crossing her arms. She stared at him, her mouth remaining firmly closed.

“Where am I?” he tried again.

A humorless smile curled her lip upward. “You’re my guest.” Her smile fell and twisted into a scowl that deepened as she unfolded her arms and stepped back toward him. _“What is happening to me?”_

She was leaning on the arms of the chair, her face about an inch away from his. Ray set his jaw, defiant.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Her face twisted. “Don’t play dumb.”

“I’m not playing anything, I don’t know what you _mean.”_

 _“This,”_ she hissed, and she flung her hand back towards an unseen object.

For a moment, nothing happened and Ray watched, confused, looking between her and her hand. She glared at him pointedly and, curling her fingers slightly, she flicked her wrist, sending the object and several other things hurtling through the air until they hit a wall. He heard them all clatter to the floor. His blood went cold.

“Get the picture?”

“Why do you think I can help you?”

“Because,” she said, her voice dropping into a whisper, “I’ve seen you do it.”

Ray’s eyes widened. He was so careful about when he used his power. He made sure to use it in public as seldom as possible, and certainly _never_ in front of anyone. He opened his mouth to object, but she cut him off.

“I’ve been watching you for a few months now. Rumor around the underground is that you’ve had these special... _abilities_ ever since you moved here a few years ago. Mine didn’t start until after you showed up. Believe me, I know; I checked the dates. This revolves around you. What did you do to me?”

Ray blinked in surprise. “I didn’t even know you existed until you showed up in my shop, why would I-”

“Jesus, Ray!” she yelled, whipping around so fast her ebony curls hit him in the face. “Things like this don’t just _happen!”_

She paced around in front of him, her arms folded, her eyes trained on the ground. Her lips were moving, silently mouthing words, but Ray wasn’t paying attention to any of it.

“How do you know my name?”

“Are you still going to pretend you don’t know mine?” she mumbled, kicking a pebble across the floor with her boot.

Ray tried to shrug, forgetting momentarily that he was tied down. “I don’t have to pretend.”

She looked like she was ready to blow a fuse. “Just tell me what you did!”

“I didn’t do anything.”

She let out a frustrated growl, kicking one of the back legs of his chair so hard it broke out from underneath him. Ray toppled over with the chair, but the woman stepped over him as she moved to pace again. “The boss’ll be furious if she finds out,” she mumbled. “She’ll have my head _and_ yours.”

She stopped pacing and crouched down in front of him, closing her hand around his chin and yanking his head up to look at her. “Tell me what you did to me. Tell me how to fix it, and everyone will be able to go their separate ways and forget this ever happened.”

Ray resisted the strong urge to roll his eyes. “You can’t just ‘fix’ it. This isn’t something to fix. It’s just how it is now. I’m sorry.”

Her face twisted into a scowl once more. She all but threw his head back to the concrete, standing and turning to pace again.

“I don’t know why you got them, and I don’t know why my presence triggered them,” he continued over the sound of her boots and her mumbling, “but I do know that if you learn how to control them, they’re nothing to be afraid of. I can help you.”

“I don’t need your help.”

“Clearly you do, or I wouldn’t be here.

She paused, her fingers twitching as if she were getting ready to wrap them around his neck and strangle him. She turned to him, her mouth opening and closing as she formulated something to say. After a moment of tense silence, she decided against speaking and stormed out of the room, leaving Ray alone.

He was tempted to call out, to ask if she was going to let him go, but he didn’t. Of course, she wouldn’t let him go. She hadn’t gotten what she wanted. Or maybe she’d given up and was simply going to leave him to die.

Oh, well. It wasn’t like he didn’t have a means of escape.

Like he had so many times before, he closed his eyes breathing in deeply. He willed the chair to stand, willed the Force to come and lift it. As soon as could manage to keep it balanced, he released his hold on it, refocusing his energy on untying the bonds. After a few seconds of concentration, the ropes on his wrists and ankles came loose and he flew from the chair, rubbing his wrists. He turned and bolted, guilt roiling his stomach. He knew how scared this girl was. He knew he could give her the answers she’d need.

His resolve hardened. He would find her again. He would help her.

Now just wasn’t the right time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've never tried my hand at writing genderbent, so hopefully it's not a total train wreck. I'm thinking of writing a part two if it's wanted or if I get the inspiration. We shall see...
> 
> For my multichap readers, the next chapter of A Fine Line really should be up sometime soon. So sorry about the long wait. Writer's block seems to want to be my best friend. 
> 
> See you soon! 
> 
> (Hopefully.)


	4. Peaceful Sleep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nightmares have long been a part of Ben's life. That simply means he has more experience dealing with them. Now, he gets to share some of his coping methods with someone else. 
> 
> Oneshot about a night where Ara's nightmares are almost as bad as Ben's. 
> 
> (Canonverse)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it has been such a long time since I've posted anything for this! Hopefully, you all find this worth the wait, and I'll try to post more regularly. 
> 
> Enjoy!

Ben woke up in a cold sweat.

He wasn’t sure of the reason, couldn’t remember what the nightmare had been about. Silvery light streamed in through the window, an obvious sign it was still nighttime. His wife’s side of the bed was vacant, her sheets pulled tight, her pillow untouched. This was understandable, no cause for alarm. She was away and had been for several days. The house was still, silent. Everything was calm. Nothing had been touched or moved, but still, his heart raced. His stomach churned. The nightmare had done its worst, affecting him though he remembered none of it. One name rang in his ears:  _ Ara. _

Basing the premise of his nightmare solely on that was enough for him to reason away the terror it had produced.

He knew what he could do to drive the fear away - something he’d done many times before. But the thought of doing it now caused guilt to settle like a weight in his stomach. While his sleeping patterns had long been disrupted by nightmares and other terrors, it wasn’t fair of him to burden his daughter with the same broken sleep cycle by relying on her for comfort after such an occurrence. So, he’d content himself with a trip to the kitchen and a glass of water.

Still, as he passed his daughter’s room, he listened for signs of life through the door. He reached out through the Force, prodding her ever-strengthening signature to confirm that all was well. She was dreaming - peaceful dreams, Ben noticed, to his relief. He’d leave her alone.

He did his best to stay silent as he moved about the house, picking his way from the hallway to the kitchen with light steps. The light clicked on and he poured himself a glass of water. After taking a long swig, he splashed some of it on his face for good measure. Though he knew for certain that Ara was all right, unease still tumbled in his thoughts. 

She was fine. He was fine. The nightmares he’d had were just that - nightmares. Terrifying though they were, they couldn’t hurt him or anyone else. Not if he didn’t let them.

Maybe he’d just sit up for a while.

As he passed Ara’s room for the second time that night, something told him to check on her again. He knew it was likely his paranoia, but he saw no harm in glancing inside.

The door slid open silently, and he stepped through the doorway. 

Ara was tossing in her bed, the sheets twisting themselves around her. She muttered frantically, her breaths coming in short bursts. Ben frowned, reaching out once again to find her in the Force. Her previous content had morphed into horror, and Ben realized that maybe the unease he felt hadn’t been his alone.

“Ara,” he whispered, crouching by her bed. “Starlight, wake up.”

Careful not to frighten her, he caught her shoulder. 

“No…” she mumbled, her face scrunching up. She whipped the other way, yanking her shoulder out of his hand. “No! Stop it, please! Stop!”

“Ara, it’s Daddy.”

She whimpered, curling into a tight ball. Ben pulled her back towards him.

“It’s me, Ara,” he insisted, fighting to stay calm. “It’s just a nightmare, Starlight. Wake up.”

The next things that happened did so swiftly, in one fluid motion. Ara became still, her eyes flew open, and she shot up with a gasp, tears still streaming down her face. Her eyes roved the empty air in front of her, the terrors she’d seen now only fading shadows. Then, almost as an afterthought that occurred when she felt the weight of his hand on her arm, she turned to him, her fear melting into relief. 

“Daddy,” she hiccuped. 

Ben was ready when she threw herself at him. He hauled her up off her bed, setting his chin on the top of her head as she buried her face in his neck. She was shaking, hoarse whimpers still falling from her lips.

“It’s okay,” he cooed. “It was just a nightmare. It can’t hurt you, I promise.”

Ara sniffed, her arms tightening around his shoulders. “Mama died,” she whispered.

Ben took a deep breath. “I have those, too,” he mumbled into her curls. 

He paced the length of her room, patting her back. Ara drew in a shuddering breath, bringing her hand up to wipe it across her face. 

“I’m sorry I woke you up.”

“You didn’t, Starlight. I was already awake.”

After some time, she quieted. Ben knew she was calmed for the most part when he felt her tugging at a few locks of his hair. He smiled.

“You okay?”

“I’m too old to have nightmares, Daddy.” 

He blinked, his eyebrows rising in surprise. “You are?”

“I heard Kora say that when you turn eight, you can’t have any more nightmares.”

A sad smile twisted Ben’s lip. “I wish that were the truth.”

“You still have nightmares, right?” Ara asked after a beat of silence, still fiddling with his hair.

“Yes, Ara, I do.”

She hummed, processing the information. “Will  _ I  _ still have nightmares when I’m a grown-up?”

Ben didn’t answer this question right away. He couldn’t promise her she wouldn’t. But, he didn’t want her to think that she’d always wake up terrified. “I hope not,” he finally said.

Again, Ara answered not in words, but a short hum. A yawn echoed through her room, and Ben swallowed a yawn of his own, moving back to her bed. 

“Daddy, no-!”

He stopped, pivoting and walking in the other direction. Ara relaxed. 

“I’m too scared to go back to sleep.”

“You should try, though.”

Her hands found his hair yet again, and again she twisted it in her fingers. “What do  _ you  _ do?”

Ben’s steady step faltered as he pondered her question. What  _ did  _ he do?

“Well,” he said. “I have the benefit of another person with me. Usually, I see your mother, and that calms me down enough to sleep. Sometimes, the dreams are about losing you. If that’s the case, I just come down here, check on you, and that’s enough for most occasions. Other times, I sit with you for a little while. When you were younger - just a baby, really, and then a few of your toddler years - I’d pick you up out of your crib and bring you back to bed with me. I always slept better when you were around. And you got to the point where you loved it so much that you were disappointed to wake up in your own bed. That’s when your mother made me stop.”

He chuckled, affectionately tickling her sides. She giggled, but only for a moment before becoming serious again. “Can I sleep with you tonight? So I can see you when I wake up and not be scared?”

Ben considered it. “You want to try that?”

He felt her nod. 

“Okay, then. Let me grab your pillow and blanket for you…”

He moved over to her bed, grabbing her pillow, blanket, and pilot doll - per Ara’s request - before moving towards the door. 

“Need anything else?”

She hugged his neck. “No.”

He closed the door of her room, trudging down the hall. “You can sleep on your mother’s side,” he said around a yawn. 

Ara yawned, too. “Okay.”

Ben fumbled for the lamp switch when they stepped through the door, eventually finding it and flipping it. He squinted at the light that filled the room, faint though it was. He lay Ara down on Rey’s side of the bed, tucking her in with both her blanket and the blankets already on the bed. 

“Comfortable?”

She nodded, rolling onto her side. Ben smiled, moving back to flip off the lights. 

“Can you leave the ‘fresher light on?”

He made a face. “I’ve already snored all the monsters away, Starlight. I promise.”

She seemed to think on it. “Only if you’re positive, Daddy.”

“I am.”

He turned the lights off and crawled into bed, rolling so he faced Ara. 

“G’night, Daddy.”

He pressed a kiss to her forehead. “‘Night, Starlight.”

She was out within minutes, Ben following close behind. 

Both of them made it through the rest of the night without incident. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it! It just came about when I was talking with a friend about how Ben's nightmares after the war were probably soothed by the presence of loved ones *coughcoughReycough* but this sprang to mind. I'm hoping you found it as adorable as I did. 
> 
> Thank you for reading! See you next time!


	5. Comfort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wars are long for everyone, no matter what side. Recovery is hard. Long. 
> 
> Sometimes, it's easier to help someone else than it is to help ourselves.
> 
> Teeny tiny (kinda heartbreaking) drabble about Reylo immediately following the war. WARNING: Implied thoughts of suicide/self-harm - used lightly, but still present. 
> 
> (Canonverse)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I've been on vacation for ten days, and was barely able to write anything, but this was something I told myself I absolutely HAD to write after watching TLJ for about the thousandth time. It just kinda hit me that sometimes I write Ben way too happy-go-lucky for what he's been through, so I decided to balance it out with this sad. 
> 
> THIS IS NOT A HAPPY ONESHOT. There is no happy ending to redeem the sad. If you are in a sad mood, two things: 1) Don't be sad, friend. Whatever's going on, it'll work itself out. It'll be okay. 2) You should go read something super warm and fluffy to make you happier, not this. 
> 
> Also, I put this in the summary, but just in case - thoughts of suicide/self-harm are present. It's brief, and where it comes up, it's vague, but it's there. 
> 
> (Try to) Enjoy!

It was hard to comfort him.

For the first days after Ben arrived at the base, he wouldn't speak. His conscious would brush against hers for moments at a time, memories and feelings overwhelming her. Then suddenly, he'd be gone, and, once again, she was left in the dark. He moved as if in a daze, acted as though he wasn't with her. He seemed surprised and relieved anytime he recognized that she was near. She wasn't bothered. He needed time.

She held him as he cried himself into fitful sleep, then again when he woke from nightmares she'd never be able to imagine. She nursed his wounds as he stared at blank walls, hummed an Alderaanian lullaby his mother had taught her so long ago. He never so much as flinched. He ate almost nothing, much less than she wanted. What little he did eat, he rarely kept down. After days of watching him sit in his own filth - never having even changed his clothes since the battle - she made him bathe. He was so bruised and bloodied, weary and broken, that he couldn't manage it. She found him sitting idly in the warm water, tears running silently down his face as he stared into the wall. She washed him, helped him into clean clothes, and combed through his hair as he cried himself to sleep, his head in her lap.

They held the final memorial for General Leia Organa two weeks after the war's official end. When she announced Ben would be in attendance, many were opposed. They claimed it would disgrace her, that it would be spitting on what she'd died for. She was appalled. This was Leia's son, the one she'd fought to bring home. Keeping him from the service would truly be the disgrace. Poe allowed that he could come, but he would not be permitted to participate any further. It was better than nothing.

The two of them stood in the back, hands entwined, unmoving. He couldn't approach the casket, couldn't say any words, share any memories. It didn't matter. He didn't seem to want to. They left almost immediately after the ceremony started.

He broke two chairs that night. A table, too. He made more noise than she had heard him make in weeks. She let him. He cried and smashed things, scattered every single one of his and her belongings across the small living space. Nothing ever came near her.

When he'd broken every single thing he could and bent everything else severely out of shape, he came and collapsed in a sobbing heap in front of her.

"It's all my fault," he said.

And that was it.

Discussion of his trial came soon after. She didn't even want to think about it. Not with the shape he was in. But it had to be done.

She was promised a private trial, closed to everyone but the few necessary personnel. He sat wordlessly the entire time, never once opening his mouth to answer any of their questions or plead for their mercy. She had wished he would surprise her, but of course, he'd prefer his certain death or destruction over a new beginning. Forgiving himself would be a hard battle. Earning others' forgiveness would be a nearly impossible one. He was entirely uninterested in saving himself.

His saving grace was that he'd helped them in the end. Not death, then, but exile. He never said a word.

They left early the next day. Finn tried to make her promise to return as they said their goodbyes. She couldn't. There was no sense in making promises she wouldn't keep. Poe wished her good luck, Rose hugged her tightly. Rose, it seemed, was the only one who could begin to know what she was thinking about, what she was feeling. She was the only one who appeared to care about the war raging inside of her, at least.

The ship was loaded, fueled. Coordinates were given, parameters set.

Then they were gone.

She allowed herself to hope that he'd open up, then. He didn't. He maintained his silence the entire way, his eyes never leaving the ship's console. She was certain that, if not for her, he would've flown the ship into oblivion.

They managed to reach the home after only a couple of days. A little house situated on a hill overlooking an unpopulated valley. Beautiful, but lonely and separated. A prison painted in charming colors.

She moved their few possessions inside, attempting to make it seem like a home. She showed Ben to his room and, after making sure she hadn't left him anything with which he could injure himself, let him be. Then she retreated to her own room.

It had been a month, at least. Since she'd had a full conversation. Since she'd had time alone. Since she'd let herself think. Thinking was a dangerous game, one she wasn't sure she should play, but now she did. Everything washed over her all at once, sucking her under, drowning her.

This was her life now. The one she'd chosen, sure, but it would be difficult just the same. She might never see her friends again. She'd never be the same person. Neither would Ben.

She cried. For hours, for minutes, she wasn't sure. She let everything release, and the tears came so easily. Too easily.

The night passed without her realizing, as did some of the next day. It was easy to let the time pass, to let it run by her as if she mattered little more than the dirt beneath her did. She wished Ben would come and find her. She stayed in the room for hours after she'd cried all her tears hoping that he would. But eventually, she had to pick herself up and continue on, act as if the world wasn't falling apart around her. Take care of Ben.

He wouldn't leave his room, but he opened up to her incrementally, letting her know he was still alive. She brought him his meals that he left uneaten, made sure he slept, gave him clothes to change into.

For the longest time, she didn't let herself think again. Thinking wasn't a luxury, wasn't a _suffering_ she could afford. She wrapped herself in Ben, made him the center of her attention. Snoke was long gone, the Order not far behind him, but there were some demons that it would take time for Ben to shake, if he ever did. He would need help doing so. So she’d forget herself for the moment, let herself fade to the back of her own mind. It was the easy way, the simple way.

Yes, it was hard for Rey to comfort him. It was harder still to comfort herself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to those who read this through to the very end! I am impressed by your emotional resilience, lol. 
> 
> I know it's short and I know I haven't posted in awhile, but I swear my writing schedule is getting back to normal. If you read my multichap (if anyone's still reading it, it's been so long since I've posted), I want to have a chapter up within the week. No promises, but I swear I'll try. 
> 
> Thank you so, so much for reading! Comments and kudos are always loved and appreciated! I'll see you next time!


	6. Fight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Settling an argument like a responsible adult and using communication to not only settle the dispute but to also strengthen your marriage? Eh. Scooting off with your best friend to avoid your significant other for as long as possible? That sounds like the much better option. 
> 
> (Modern!AU)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't posted a chapter on my multichap in over a month. Hopefully I'll have it out by the end of this week. In the meantime, here's a short little one-shot I wrote a long time ago. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

_ 27 missed calls. _

Rey rolled her eyes and shoved her phone back in her pocket. This was ridiculous. If he was so desperate to talk to her, he could do it in person. He knew where to find her. It’s not like she’d been secretive about where she’d been headed as she stormed out of their apartment.

She stared out at the snow flurrying past the window as Finn came back to the booth they’d occupied, stumbling into his seat. He swore under his breath. “Damn tables are too short.”

Rey absentmindedly fiddled with the rim of her mug. “Or your legs are too long.”

Finn shook his head, annoyed. “Either way, I’m not a fan of this place. Would it kill them to invest in a normal table? Even a tall one with stools. You know what?  _ Especially _ one with stools.”

Rey took a sip of her waterlogged tea, making a face. “You can’t do that. It takes away from the charm.”

Finn rolled his eyes, but Rey smiled. This place wasn’t exactly the nicest or most modern building she’d ever been in, no. But Rey couldn’t deny it was certainly like home. It had been the source of her first real paycheck, her first step towards a life without Plutt. It was also where she’d met Finn, and she’d met her husband right outside. She wouldn’t trade this place for the world. Ben knew that. And he knew he’d find her right here, if he looked hard enough.

After eyeing her in silence for a few moments, Finn sighed. “Still hasn’t called?”

“Oh, he has.” Her face flushed as her phone buzzed once again in her pocket. She took another swig of her tea as she pulled it out. “28 times, to be exact. I just still haven’t answered.”

The phone stopped buzzing, and she set it in the seat beside her, relieved.

“You’re going to worry him sick.”

“Good.”

She took another drink of her tea before her phone rang again. She huffed, setting her mug down just a little harder than necessary before pulling her phone up from the worn leather cushion.

“Just answer it.”

_ “No.” _

She declined the call, switching her phone to silent for good measure. She tossed the phone onto the table face down, pushing it as far away from her as she could. “He knows what to do if he wants to talk to me,” she said, holding the handle of her mug so tightly her knuckles were white. “He should be man enough to come here and do it face-to-face since he thinks he was ‘man’ enough to say what he said.”

Finn swished the contents of his own mug around half-heartedly, staring into the murky brownness. “Rey, it was a fight. He was mad, you were mad, and both of you said things I’m sure you shouldn’t have. But now you’re just being ridiculous. What if something were to happen to him because he was out looking for you? You’d never be able to forgive yourself. And he’d certainly never forgive himself if something were to happen to you because of this fight. So, please, do me and everyone else in this universe a favor, and just call him.”

Rey stared at him, offended. “Whose side are you on?”

“Common sense’s side.”

She rolled her eyes, turning to look out the window again. “I called you to get  _ away  _ from him  _ and  _ this conversation, Finn. Besides, he knows where I am. If he wants me, he can come find me.”

“I don’t think that’s how marriages are supposed to work,” he mumbled, but he didn’t press the issue any further.

They were both silent, but now the silence was suffocating. Though she’d never admit it, Finn had planted a seed of worry. What if something  _ did  _ happen? What if something already had? And what if the person calling wasn’t him, but someone who’d found him, trying to reach his next of kin? What if he was injured and dying and she should be at his bedside right now, but she was being so stubborn she wouldn’t even know he was going until he was gone? Sure, she was mad, but if anything happened to Ben…

She took a deep breath, allowing her anger to return. This was crazy. Nothing had happened to Ben. He was perfectly healthy. Perfectly fine, except for the fact that, at the moment, he was being an idiot. Any minute now he’d come walking through the door.

Any minute now…

She waited. She watched the snow fly past the window again, falling harder now than it had been before. Horrible weather to be traveling in. It made accidents almost a given-

He’d be just a few seconds more…

She checked her watch. It had been almost an hour since she’d left the apartment.

He was turning the corner right now…

She took a drink of her tea. It was getting cold, settling in her stomach like a weight.

He was trudging up the street…

She took another sip of her tea.

He’d gotten stopped by a slow-walking group of pedestrians in front of him…

And another.

He’d probably stopped to help some poor old woman who’d slipped on the ice…

Her tea was gone.

He’d be here any time now, he just couldn’t find the right building. The sign  _ was _ pretty small…

Her fingers were tapping her legs, the table, the seat beside her. She had so much pent up nervous energy, she could burst.

Any second...any second…

Eventually, Rey’s heart was beating so fast and so hard, she could hear it. She was surprised Finn hadn’t made a comment about hearing it, too. She looked at him and he seemed none the wiser about her paranoia.

“Why hasn’t he shown up?” she finally blurted.

“Maybe he isn’t going to cater to your pettiness,” Finn mumbled bitterly into his lukewarm coffee.

“Or maybe you’re right and something’s happened to him. I’ve got to call.”

She reached across the table and snatched up her phone, her fingers fumbling clumsily as she struggled to find his number. Just before she hit the call button, the door to the small shop burst open, snow and cold air tumbling inside along with what seemed to be a furry giant.

But Rey knew better.

It rushed toward their table as Rey slid out of the booth, and it engulfed her in an embrace when it reached them. Rey’s eyes widened.

“Ben, you’re freezing.”

It was a dumb thing to say, but it seemed the most obvious, the least harmful.

“Sorry,” came his muffled voice from behind his scarf. He pulled it away, shedding his coat, too, and dropping it into the booth Rey had been sitting in moments before. “I’m sorry,” he said again, taking her hands in his. They were coldcold, too, too, she noticed distantly. “About all of it. Everything. I was a moron. I had no right to say those things to you, Rey. No right. Please, come home.”

He finally stopped to take a breath, his eyes scanning her face. His anxious expression softened into one of relief and he sighed, taking her face in his hands. “Thank God you’re okay,” he mumbled, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “I called so many times. I thought something had happened after you stormed out-”

“I know,” Rey mumbled, her face flushing in embarrassment. She’d caused him to panic over nothing. She shoved her phone into her back pocket.

“I would’ve been here sooner. I couldn’t find this place with all the snow. God, Rey, I’m so sorry. Please, just...never do that again. I was getting so scared. I thought surely you’d pick up after I’d called so many times-”

“I’m sorry about that. I was being stubborn and selfish...and I kind of wanted to worry you. But being mad doesn’t give me the right to act like a child. I’m sorry about what I said earlier, too. Let’s just...forget it?”

He smiled, his eyes lighting up and his expression warming. “Okay.”

“Good. Now, sit down and warm up. Your hands are like ice.”

He pressed another kiss to her forehead before looping an arm around her shoulders and leading her back to the booth. Rey slid in easily, but Ben managed the transition with less ease than even Finn.

“Damn tables,” he muttered. “Too low.”

“Right?” Finn asked around a mouthful of coffee. 

Rey couldn’t stifle her laugh.


	7. Healing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Ben wakes up in a strange place and finds a lone little girl, he's not sure what to think. As time goes on, he starts to wonder if maybe there's more to it.
> 
> (Canonverse)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've had this one in my writing folder for quite a while. It's kind of inspired by the idea that Rey and Ben both heal each other's wounds from their formative years and beyond. It might be one of my favorite things that I've ever written. There might be a part two to this somewhere down the road, but don't quote me on that; I'm pretty bad at following through with things like this, lol.
> 
> Enjoy!

Ben couldn’t for the life of him figure out how he’d gotten here. He didn’t even remember wanting to be here at any point in the past several days. The last thing he remembered was...well, he  _ didn't  _ remember. A conversation he’d had with Rey came to mind, but he didn’t know what about, or when. He didn’t figure that counted as ‘remembering’.

It was hot wherever he was. A large, bright sun had started its descent from the middle of the sky. Sand covered everything, dry wind blowing the grains in his face. He looked himself over and saw he was dressed for the weather, though how he didn’t know. He wore sand-colored garments; a tattered, long-sleeve tunic, thick pants, heavy boots, and a cowl draped across his shoulders, the hood pulled up to cover his head. The extreme temperatures may have been uncomfortable, but they weren’t his biggest problem. No, his biggest problem was that there was no one else around. His wife was gone, there was no ship, and no sign of a town or village. Wherever Ben was, he was alone.

Panic welled up in him, a piece of him terrified that something had happened to Rey. He forced himself to swallow it until he knew for sure she wasn’t all right. His wife had taught him long ago that there was no sense worrying about something you weren’t sure of. He calmed himself, closing his eyes and reaching out to find her signature. He soon found it, mingled with his, bright and strong as always. Not even a hint of distress emanating from her or their bond. She was fine. Wherever she was.

But Ben still needed to find her.

“Are you lost, mister?”

Ben started, looking down at the source of the voice in alarm. A small human girl, only five or six standard years old, gripped the edge of his tunic, tugging at it. She, too, was dressed for the weather, her entire body covered by lightly colored clothing and a scarf wrapped around her head, hiding everything but her face. Dirt streaked her clothing and the part of her face Ben saw, and she was thin. Unhealthily so. It looked like she hadn’t eaten a decent meal in years, maybe ever. Tiny hazel orbs peered up at him through the folds of fabric, scanning his face like she was deciding whether she should trust him. Eventually, she decided she could because her gaze softened.

She must not have had a clue who he was - who he  _ used  _ to be, anyway - or she would not have made that decision so rapidly.

“Hey, I asked if you were lost.”

Ben blinked. “Uhm, yeah, actually. Yeah, I am. Are - are you from around here?”

She nodded. Perfect. A local would know their way around much better than he would. 

“Have you seen my wife?” he asked. “She’s about... _ this  _ tall,” he held up a hand to indicate her height, “and has brown hair just past her shoulder. She has a sort of Core accent, sounds almost Coruscanti in nature. Kind of like yours, but a little more noticeable. She probably had a moderately-sized, blue-and-white astromech droid with her.”

The girl shrugged, her small shoulders barely able to make it up and down underneath all of her layers of clothing. “Sorry, I don’t know of any ladies like that.”

Ben deflated, though he wasn’t sure why he’d expected this child to know enough to help him. 

“That’s all right. Thank you anyway-”

“But I can help you find her!” the girl was quick to say. 

She flashed a gap-toothed smile, her eyes hopeful. Ben smiled back. “I’d love the help, but don’t you have a home to be getting back to? I don’t want your parents to be worried about you.”

Her face fell. “I don’t have any parents here.”

Ben’s smile also faded. Embarrassment made his cheeks burn. “Oh.”

He didn’t know what else to say. What else  _ did  _ you say?

Ben looked around, even though there wasn’t much else to look at. He wouldn’t meet her eyes. Unexpectedly, he felt a small hand close around his fingers, pulling his arm away from his side. 

“It’s okay,” the little girl whispered as she began dragging him towards what Ben assumed was the direction of town, “you didn’t know.” She brightened. “But that means I can help you! What did you say she looked like? Will you know her when you see her? There’s lots of people in town; I bet she’s there.”

“I’ll definitely know her when I see her,” Ben smiled.

‘And probably before then, too, if our bond is to be trusted.’

The child babbled away as they walked, talking about nothing and everything, but Ben was too occupied with studying her to listen. She trudged along but with a bounce in her step, like she was tired, but too proud to show it. And she dragged a large, mesh bag behind her. It was secured at her shoulder, filled with machine parts in varying degrees of deterioration. They looked like parts to a ship engine. A tug of familiarity pulled at the back of Ben’s psyche, but he couldn’t quite place it, so he brushed it aside. 

“How did you lose your wife?” he heard the girl ask. 

Ben opened his mouth to answer when he realized, he didn’t  _ know  _ how he’d lost Rey. To be honest, he wasn’t sure they’d even been together to begin with. He may have come here alone. 

“I’m sure we were just separated by a sandstorm or something,” he lied. “I’ve probably worried her sick. I apologize in advance for anything... _ distasteful  _ she says in front of you when we find her.”

The girl giggled, something Ben couldn’t imagine she did very often. Thinking about it made him upset; he knew how it felt to have an unhappy childhood. 

_ “I  _ think she’ll be very happy to see you again.”

Ben chuckled. Seconds later, the girl was far into a tangent about the planet they were on, all its pretty spots (though Ben couldn’t see anything but sand for miles in every direction), how hot it usually was, things of that nature. Not once did she mention its name, and she was talking so fast, he couldn’t manage to get a word in edgewise. Though normally, Ben would’ve found a child like her irritating, something about her quirks made her endearing, and never before had he seen a child in her situation so happy, so he indulged her. 

After a few minutes, she perked up, halting mid-sentence. Ben followed her line of sight to a small grouping of tents and stands in the distance. 

“That’s the outpost! I bet she’s there.”

Even from far away, Ben could see that there weren’t many people there at all, but that didn’t mean that Rey wasn’t one of them. Oddly enough, her signature wasn’t getting harder or easier to find like it usually did when the distance between them changed. It was staying constant. He wasn’t going to be able to use that method. Looked like the old-fashioned way of  _ using his eyes  _ was going to have to do. 

He picked up his pace to keep up with the little girl who was now scampering along so fast that she was tripping over her bag. When he noticed this for the tenth time, he pulled her to a stop. She turned back to him, confused. 

“Do you want me to carry that for you? It looks a little heavy.”

She shook her head. 

“It’s the least I can do,” he insisted. “You’re helping me, after all.”

Her eyes darkened and both of her hands went to the ends of the bag tied at her shoulder. “No,” she said. “I’m fine.”

Her reaction confused him to say the least, but he didn’t push it. He took her hand again and she led him the rest of the way to town, this time in silence. What had looked to Ben like an abandoned outpost before was much busier up close. Rey very well  _ could  _ be here. 

“Do you see her?”

He didn’t, but just because she wasn’t in the immediate area didn’t mean she wasn’t here. “No. I’ll keep looking though.”

The little girl nodded, letting go of his hand. “I have to go do something. I’ll be right back, okay?”

Ben watched her scamper off, waiting until she was out of his line of vision to move. He walked the entire perimeter of the outpost, his eyes scanning the area, his signature reaching for hers. There was nothing. She was nowhere. Ben was starting to become concerned. 

It was strange to him that Rey didn’t seem to be bothered by what was happening in the slightest. There was no urgency about her signature, no anxiety pulsing through their bond. He would’ve been offended by her insouciance if he wasn’t so confused by it. 

When he was certain Rey was not there, he went looking for the little girl. She was at the hub of the outpost at a counter she had to stand on her toes to see over. She was talking in a quiet voice to someone hidden inside. Ben decided not to intrude and he stayed a few meters away, close enough to hear what was being said, but hidden in the shadows cast by a tent. 

“But you said yesterday that this was what you wanted,” she was saying. “You said you’d give  _ two whole portions _ to anyone who brought them. I found them just for that. I had to look for them all day; I-I don’t have anything else.”

She sounded panicked; she was gripping the counter’s edge so tightly her knuckles were white.

“I don’t have time for sob stories!” a gruff voice shouted. “I don’t want the parts today,  _ brat. _ If you’ve got nothing else, you can either give me what you got for half a portion, or you can leave and go hungry.”

The voice was cold, heartless. The bubbly child that Ben met in the desert had disappeared in its wake. Ben took a few steps closer, noticing tears in the child’s eyes.

“I haven’t eaten anything in almost three days, sir,” she whimpered. “I’m so hungry. I need those portions.”

“So does everyone else here. If you don’t have parts, then  _ scram.” _

Ben tensed. The girl sniffed, but she pulled her bag from the ground and put the parts on the counter, pushing them towards the window, before holding out her hand to accept whatever it was she was owed. 

“What’s this?” the voice inside the counter scoffed. 

She flinched. “The parts you asked for, sir.”

“I wasn’t expecting  _ garbage!  _ I can’t sell these! These are in worse shape than I’ll accept. I won’t give you anything for them.”

“They were the best ones out there,” the girl insisted. “They were the only ones I could find!”

“If you’ve got nothing else, you’re going hungry tonight.”

“No!” she hiccuped, panic shining in her eyes now. “No, please, I’ll find something else!”

“Not good enough! We’re closing!”

The shutters slammed shut and the girl fell backward, landing hard in the sand. She didn’t do anything for a moment, blinking as if she couldn’t quite believe what had happened, before bringing her knees to her chest and burying her head in her folded arms. Her shoulders shook in silent cries and her beat up parts began rolling off the counter, hitting the ground with loud  _ thunks.  _ Ben, who’d been watching in silent horror and disgust, marched forward, fury burning like a fire in his chest. He stomped up to the counter, taking care not to step on the distraught little girl crying in the sand. He wrenched the shutters up and they rolled to the top of the window with a loud  _ crack. _

“Your offer isn’t good enough,” he growled. 

The trader - a short, fat, hideous Crolute - turned to look at him, his face twisted into a scowl. “And just who are  _ you?” _

Ben ignored him. “You asked for parts; she gave them to you. You owe her payment now. You owe her food.”

“I don’t owe her anything! If she doesn’t have parts for me, she doesn’t get food!”

“That’s extortion!”

“It’s payment for a  _ service!” _

_ “She’s a child!” _ Ben roared. 

He could feel the eyes of everyone present trained on him, but he didn’t care. In fact, it was probably better this way. Someone needed to stand up to this sleazeball. 

“She works just like everyone else here. And just like everyone else here, she gets paid when she does her job. She didn’t do her job today. She doesn’t get food.”

Ben was appalled. “She just told you she was starving. Can’t you cut her a bit of a break? If one person,  _ one,  _ can go out and do a better job than she did, I want to see them do it. She told you these were the only parts out there like the ones you asked for yesterday. I know these parts. I know how rare they are,  _ especially  _ on a planet like this. And if she went to all the trouble of finding them for you, the  _ least  _ you could do is pay her for her time. What did you tell her you would give her for them yesterday?”

When the Crolute didn’t respond, Ben turned to the little girl, who was now staring up at the two of them in disbelief. 

“What did he promise you yesterday?” he asked, his voice considerably gentler than when he’d been speaking with the trader. 

She watched him blankly for a moment before she shook her head. “Let’s just go,” she whispered, crawling to grab her discarded machine parts and put them back in her bag. 

Ben’s heart went out to her. He crouched down, placing his hand over her much smaller one, stopping her. For a reason unfathomable to him, he was not going to let this go. “You went out and worked hard, while you were starving and tired, so you could get this food,” he said. “You deserve to be paid. He owes you whatever amount of food he said he’d give. It isn’t fair of him to treat you like this. What did he say he’d give you?”

She glanced up at him, her hazel eyes - strikingly familiar - wide and filled with tears. She averted her gaze. “Two portions.”

Ben shoved the feeling of familiarity down, standing to face the trader again. “You heard her. Two portions.”

“I never told her anything! She’s lying!”

Ben leaned across the counter, his voice low. “I think you and I both know that I could find at least a dozen people here who could tell me otherwise.”

“Who do you think you are?”

Ben curled his fingers, willing the Force to prod the sticky flesh of the Crolute’s neck. The trader shifted, rolling his shoulders. Ben increased the pressure, just to be sure he felt it. “I’m  _ not  _ someone who’s going to stand idly by while you take advantage of a child. While you let her  _ starve.” _

“I will not just-”

Ben made it quite obvious what had caused the sudden tightness of his throat, squeezing for the briefest of moments before returning to the previous pressure. The trader’s eyes widened before narrowing. “I could turn you in for this.”

“I could say the same for you. And I do believe that if I did so, this whole operation would be shut down, putting not only you, but  _ all  _ of these people out of a job. But...if you give this girl what she’s due, and you promise to do better about paying her in the future, I’ll let it slide.”

The Crolute reached further inside the hut and pulled out several packets of what Ben assumed was food, slamming them down on the countertop before sweeping what she’d brought him inside. “Take ‘em! I don’t care! Just be sure that she brings me adequate merchandise next time.”

“If you want your merchandise to be to your liking, go out and find it yourself,” Ben hissed over the counter. “Do your own grunt work instead of making  _ children _ do it for you.”

He released the Crolute, a sick thrill pulsing through him when he saw the man gasp and rub his throat. The shutters slammed shut, but this time, Ben let them stay that way. He took the packets off the counter and handed them to the little girl, bending down to pick up her bag. She didn’t seem to mind him having it this time - probably because it was no longer carrying the only chance she had for food, and she didn’t have to worry about him stealing it. 

The thought, though fleeting, was hard for Ben to swallow. 

Slinging the bag over his shoulder, he held a hand out to her, waiting for her to get up off the ground and dust herself off. She took his hand, holding the food packets she’d received close to her chest with her other arm. Ben led her away from all the eyes that had stopped what they were doing to stare, squeezing her hand in reassurance. 

“You’re all right,” he whispered. “Let’s get out of here.”

Once they were about a kilometer away from the trading post, he stopped, crouching so he was level with her. “Are you okay?”

She nodded, but she wouldn’t meet his eyes.

“You shouldn’t let him treat you like that.”

She sniffed, her eyes still cast downward. “No one stands up to him. If they do, he doesn’t give them anything. I don’t want him to give me nothing. I  _ can’t _ get nothing! I’m just so hungry-!”

“Hey, it’s okay. It’s all right,” Ben cut her off. 

Her voice had risen an octave in those few sentences, and it was clear she was ready to panic again. He pointed at the packets she held. “You have food for today. You’re all right for today. Right?”

She nodded. Ben sighed, watching her closely. With her head ducked, she didn’t realize that he could see when a tear slipped down her face. His chest tightened. She reached up quickly to swipe it away, drawing her food packets closer to her midsection. Another pang of familiarity twisted Ben’s stomach, but he, again, brushed it aside. 

“Where do you live?”

She looked off in the distance, pointing into the empty desert. Ben followed her finger. There was nothing. Sand stretching to forever in every direction. It must have been quite a ways away. He turned back to her, catching the end of a yawn that crinkled the skin at the corners of her eyes. 

“You’re exhausted,” he whispered. He thought for a moment. “Here.”

He took her packets of food from her and stuck them in a pouch that hung at his side. She grew panicked, her breathing turning shallow, her eyes going wide. Ben, realizing his mistake, reached out and put his hands on her shoulders. She stiffened, but Ben didn’t remove his hands. 

“I won’t take your food from you, okay? I promise. I’ll give it right back as soon as we get you home. Do you trust me?”

She had no reason to. But she was a small child. Their trust was easily gained, right? No way would he give her a reason  _ not _ to trust him. He saw too much of himself in her. Scared. Alone. Defenseless.

She nodded. 

“All right.” He turned and offered his back. “Climb on. I’ll carry you home.”

After a moment, he felt a small, warm body shuffle up against him, a pair of stubby arms wrapping themselves around his neck. He hoisted her up, placing his arms underneath her to keep her from falling. He felt her rest her head on his shoulder, and half expected to feel her breathing even out, but she stayed awake. 

“Comfortable?”

She nodded. Ben checked to make sure that they had everything he’d seen her with earlier, then they were off. 

“Do you live alone?” he asked.

“Yeah,” she mumbled.

That didn’t sit well with him. 

“Have you always lived here?” he asked a little bit later.

She remained silent. Either she’d fallen asleep, or he’d found off-limits territory. He assumed it was the former. Ben didn’t press it. He remained silent as they continued the trek to her home, listening to the sound of her even breathing. He used the time to think. 

With how low the sun had crept, he figured his chances of finding Rey were slim to none. But where could she be? Hopefully, she wasn’t out wandering the desert alone like he was. But if she was, was she all right? Surely. She’d lived on a planet like this one almost her whole life. She’d know how to handle herself. Ben just hoped they found each other before either of them died of starvation. 

It bothered him that he still wasn’t sure how they’d gotten here. He didn’t know why they’d come. He didn’t know when they’d landed. He didn’t even know where  _ here  _ was. He could ask the child sleeping on his back, but he doubted that even if he knew where he was, he’d be able to remember anything. It was like his mind had been blocked off from the information, which was yet another thing for him to worry about. Rey and he were fully aware of the threat some people envisioned them to be, and those people were more than capable of taking whatever measures they deemed necessary to make sure that the two of them didn’t cause any problems. Panic flared, but he shoved it away. Panicking wouldn’t help anyone. But if anything had happened to Rey…

“Did you see your wife anywhere?” the little girl drawled behind him. 

Ben had almost forgotten she was there. “Uh...no, no I didn’t see her. Something tells me I won’t be finding her tonight.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault.”

It was silent again for a few minutes, and Ben wondered if she’d fallen back asleep. But then, she spoke again.

“You can stay with me until you find her.”

Ben was touched. This little girl who had  _ nothing _ was willing to offer everything she had for a complete stranger. He almost felt guilty. 

“I don’t want to make you do that,” he said. “I can find someplace to stay, I’m sure.”

“Oh.” She was silent for a beat. “Okay.”

They walked along in awkward silence for a few more long moments before Ben realized with a jolt that maybe she  _ wanted  _ him to stay with her. She was lonely. There was no one around for kilometers in every direction. She probably got scared late into the night. Despite the fact that she’d known him for maybe a couple hours at most, she felt safer when he was around, especially after what he’d done for her at the outpost.

“Are you sure you wouldn’t mind?”

“I wouldn’t mind!” she perked up.

“It’s just - I don’t know my way around very well, and it’s getting late. If you’re sure you’re okay with it, I’d be very grateful if you gave me a place to stay tonight.”

“That’s fine! I don’t mind at all!”

Ben chuckled, listening to her talk more as she woke up from the nap that seemed to have worked wonders. The walk back to her home was a long one, and they had to make a couple of stops so Ben could rest. When she finally instructed him to stop, the sun was so low in the sky that it was hard to see. It had been hours since they’d left the outpost, and Ben couldn’t believe that the little girl made the trek every day. 

She slid off his back, pulling her bag with her. They’d come to a stop in front of a felled AT-AT walker, hidden in some places by sand drifts. She scampered up to a small hole in its underbelly, waving him inside before disappearing into it. Ben walked up next to the AT-AT, bending at the waist to peer inside. She had it set up like it was her own little apartment. If Ben weren’t so upset by the fact that she’d had to do something like this all by herself, he would’ve been impressed. He squeezed inside, getting a better look at the makeshift home. 

Though the opening had been small, there was enough room in the interior for Ben to rise to his full height. A small pallet resided by one wall, covered in thin material Ben assumed she used as blankets. Holes in the AT-AT’s skeleton and small sheets of metal she’d secured to the walls were used as shelves, small little knick-knacks and trinkets strewn about them, including a small mess of fabric and wires he assumed was supposed to be a doll. Several electrical wires and machinery parts stuck out at odd angles, but she made use of them. It looked semi-dangerous for a young girl to live in. 

“I have to say,” he mumbled, turning to face her, “I’m kind of impre-”

He stopped short, dumbfounded. 

“Rey?”

He hadn’t meant to say it. It had been startled out of him by what he’d seen, though it couldn’t possibly be real. The girl had taken off all of her protective layers, including her headscarf. Without it, he could see her hair, which was done in a trio of buns Ben knew  _ very  _ well. 

She froze, turning to him. “How do you know my name?”

Suddenly, the familiarity began to make sense.

How? How could it possibly be Rey;  _ his  _ Rey? This couldn’t really be her. It had to be someone in a similar situation...with the exact same name. What were the odds of  _ that  _ happening? Probably infinitesimal. 

They stared at each other in bewildered silence for several seconds before Ben cleared his throat, desperately trying to recover from the situation he’d put himself in. “I didn’t! I don’t! I just...guessed. Is - is that really your name?”

She was silent for a moment, but eventually, she nodded. “Yes. What’s yours?”

“Ben.”

She offered a small smile. “I like that name.” 

She stood up, moving to put her things away. After a moment, she paused. “Why did you guess my name was Rey?”

Ben swallowed thickly. “I know a Rey; you, uh, remind me of her.”

Her brow furrowed, but she went along with it. “Who’s she?”

“A...friend.”

She nodded, turning back to put her things away. “I hope she’s nice.”

“She is.”

Tiny Rey hummed, turning back to him. She looked at him almost like she was expecting something, but Ben didn’t have a clue what it was she wanted. After a few beats of silence, she flushed.

“Can I...have my food? I don’t want to be mean...”

“Oh! Oh, yes, of course. I completely forgot, sorry. Here,” he handed her the packets from the pouch at his side. 

She snatched them from his hands, moving to a small, makeshift table a few meters away. She tore open the first packet, stuffing her cheeks with its contents. Ben turned away from her to hide his bemused expression. 

_ How?  _ That was the only word in his head.  _ How  _ was she here?  _ How  _ was  _ he  _ here?  _ How  _ was she as young as she was if he was as old as he was? If she was even his Rey. Again, maybe she wasn’t. Maybe she was someone else entirely, and this was just a coincidence of the highest caliber. That had to be what this was. There was no other way to explain it.

Something on the wall opposite him caught his eye, and he turned to face it, his heart performing a somersault when he saw that it was a bunch of small tick marks scratched into the metal surface. He’d heard Rey talk about doing the same thing many times before, something she’d done to count the days until her parents came back for her. 

An odd feeling of dread settled over him.

Behind him, Tiny Rey started coughing, choking on something she'd swallowed. Ben whirled around, rushing over and patting her firmly on the back until she managed to pass whatever it was that had gotten caught in her throat. He held her canteen up to her, making sure she took a long drink before he allowed her to put it back on the table. 

“Slow down, okay? I know you’re hungry, but let’s make sure you don’t hurt yourself.”

She blushed for the second time that night, smiling. “Sorry…” Suddenly, her eyes went wide. “Do you want some?”

Ben shook his head. She shrugged and turned back to her meal, eating it carefully. Ben watched her, slowly but surely picking up on mannerisms and facial expressions he’d seen from his wife more times than he could count. This was his Rey. Just...twenty standard years younger than he knew her to be. 

“Are you all right?”

Ben blinked hard, nodding when her words registered. But he was far from all right. This little girl in front of him was his  _ wife.  _ Except, she wasn’t. Not yet. At this point in her life, they’d never even met.  _ How  _ was she this young? Where was  _ his  _ Rey? The Grey Jedi, Resistance Hero,  _ adult  _ Rey?

“Mr. Ben? Are you okay?”

He nodded absently. “Yes. I’m all right. Sorry, I had a thought about where my wife might be.”

Suddenly reminded of the reason for their meeting, she perked up. “Is she okay?”

“Yeah,” he said, almost tempted to laugh at the irony of their situation. “Yeah, I think she’ll turn out to be just fine.”

She sighed in relief, a wide, familiar grin splitting her face in half. “That’s good.”

Ben forced himself to smile back.

Something outside the AT-AT caught the little girl’s eye and she gasped, running to the opening and looking to the sky. She beamed back at him, running to grab his hand and pull him out after her. Ben squinted against the setting sun, almost gone behind the hills of sand that made up the horizon. As he stared, he hardly noticed Tiny Rey clambering up the side of the AT-AT, finding invisible footholds to hoist herself up. 

“Hey!”

He pulled his eyes away from the horizon, blinking in surprise when he saw her waving at him from the top of the AT-AT. She was beaming, her eyes hopeful, and what could he do but oblige? With much less ease and grace than she had managed it with, he clambered to the top, unable to keep a smile at bay when she ‘pulled’ him the last of the way up.

“Look,” she said, pointing at the sunset.

Her eyes scanned the line of sand dunes, wide in awe. Ben followed her gaze, yet again marveling at how something so simple and dull in the daytime could be made into something so breathtaking. She hopped to the front edge of the AT-AT and sat down, dangling her legs over the side. 

“It  _ is  _ pretty amazing, isn’t it?” Ben asked as he took a seat beside her. 

“This isn’t even the best part,” she whispered.

She was right. 

Eventually, the sun dipped completely below the sand, and the sky darkened enough for them to see the stars. Even though Ben had seen them through viewports from space, as up close and gigantic as you could see them, he’d always prefer looking at them from the ground. 

There were so many of them, each of them surrounded by other planets and systems of life. He’d visited tons. Most of them with Rey. Some of them with other members of the Resistance. Some he’d even visited with the Order. But this tiny version of his wife seated next to him still hadn’t visited a single one. 

Even with the stars displayed above them, he was more interested in observing the child. He wasn’t entirely convinced this wasn’t some vivid hallucination or trap. Maybe he was only sharing a memory with her. But if that were the case, how could this younger version of her see him? And wouldn’t it be over by now? It had been hours.

Almost without him noticing, the poor thing fell asleep. Her head rested on his arm, her shoulders heaving as she breathed. Ben pitied her. He was surprised she hadn’t gone to sleep sooner. Gently, he shifted and picked her up, and he found an easier way to the ground than the way they’d climbed. By some miracle, she managed to stay asleep through his clumsy maneuvering, though she stirred a couple of times. 

When he climbed back inside the AT-AT, he picked his way through its littered interior and placed Tiny Rey on her cot. As if she had been there the whole time, she rolled on her side and continued sleeping. If Ben hadn’t been so floored by the circumstances, he might’ve smiled. He pulled the thin fabric rumpled at the end of her bed up around her shoulders, but, unsatisfied with how much warmth it offered her, he pulled his cowl from around his shoulders and wrapped her in that, too. Then, he sat back on the bed and stared. 

This was crazy. Absolutely insane. He’d just put Rey to bed as if she were five years old. Which, he guessed, she was at this point. By the look of it, it hadn’t been long since she’d been dropped off on this planet by the drunkards she had the misfortune of calling her parents. Even the thought of it caused hot ire to rise in him like a flame. She was endearingly optimistic, adorable even malnourished with sand and ship grease streaked across her face, and still, somehow, the monsters that called themselves her parents had found it in themselves to dump her on someone else for money? If only he could do something about it. 

Suddenly in desperate need of fresh air, he stood up and walked outside, venturing far enough away from the door that he wouldn’t accidentally wake her by making any noise. Leaning against the wall, he looked back to the stars. 

When he woke up tomorrow, would he still be here? Was it really even nighttime? If he really was here, if he went home tomorrow, would Rey be there? Or had she been ripped away from him forever by this strange turn of events? His chest tightened.

“Rey?” he whispered to the stars. “Are you there? Is this some sort of training? A test of our bond? I can’t remember anything, I don’t  _ know  _ anything about whatever this is. If you’re there, please answer.”

As he expected, nothing happened. He sighed, closing his eyes to find her signature once more. Still, it burned strong and unburdened. She didn’t seem very concerned. 

Maybe he shouldn’t be, either.

The stars still twinkled down at him when he opened his eyes, though he’d half-hoped that closing them would jostle him out of this...whatever it was. He wasn’t very tired. He doubted he would be tonight, even after the day he’d had. He’d just stay awake and make sure nothing happened to Tiny Rey while he was more or less stuck here.

The AT-AT was not the most comfortable thing to lean against, so Ben shifted to find a better position. He closed his eyes again, just to put himself together. He felt so small here, for whatever reason. It overwhelmed him, the fact that, based on Rey’s age in this universe, he hadn’t yet made the decision to be Kylo Ren. Somewhere out there was a version of himself that still struggled against Snoke. A version of himself that had no clue what his future held, no inkling of the monster he’d become. What if he could find himself? Find the younger Ben and warn him, maybe even assure him that he wasn’t as alone as he felt. But, then he ran the risk of never meeting Rey at all. He wasn’t sure he’d erase her completely from his life just for the opportunity to erase all he’d done. In fact, he’d do everything over again the exact same way, every time, if doing it differently at all meant eliminating Rey from the equation. 

Ben’s head whipped toward the AT-AT opening as, inside, several things clattered to the ground. He pushed off the wall just as Tiny Rey burst out into the night, his cowl still wrapped around her shoulders. Tears streamed down her face and her breaths came in short bursts, and it was too long before Ben realized his mistake. Her searching eyes finally found him and something akin to a sob jarred her forward. She barrelled into his leg, burying her face in his stomach. 

“I-” she hiccupped, her words muffled by his shirt. “I thought you’d left me. I was - so scared.”

Ben patted the back of her head, draping his arm over her shoulder with the least amount of uncertainty he could manage. Sure, this was Rey, but it was a  _ child  _ version of Rey. He’d never been very adept at consoling children in tears. 

“Why would I leave? I told you I’d stay here.”

“Just don’t leave,” she whimpered. “Please, don’t leave.”

Something in him twinged. He’d heard  _ his  _ Rey say that before. Many more times than he would’ve wanted for her. It was easy to do what she needed for comfort, then. 

Ben pulled the little girl away just enough for him to crouch down and look her in the eye. “Hey,” he said, brushing some of her hair from her eyes, “I wouldn’t leave without telling you, first. I promise. I’m staying right here until I find my wife. Okay?”

He felt bad promising these things. After all, he had no clue what was going on, and what if she woke up tomorrow and he was gone? But, if he had a say in the matter, he’d be staying as long as possible.

“Rey?”

She nodded to show she understood. He pulled her to him, wrapping his arms around her as tightly as possible without hurting her. For a moment, she stiffened and Ben was worried that Tiny Rey wasn’t as fond of cuddles as Adult Rey. But after the moment of shock passed, she flung her arms around his neck. He adjusted to pick her up and she sniffed, burying her face in his neck as he stood. 

“You’re okay,” he assured her. “I’m not going anywhere.”

She curled in on him, wrapping her little legs around his midsection and clinging to him like he was life itself. He returned the squeeze. 

“I’m sorry,” she whispered.

“Don’t be sorry. There’s nothing for you to be sorry for.”

He rocked her back and forth, rubbing a hand up and down her back as he mumbled comforting words. It got easier to comfort her the more he tried, and after what seemed like hours she was finally calm enough to sleep. He felt guilty as he tucked her back into bed. This time, he wouldn’t leave her line of vision. But he didn’t feel right leaving the door unguarded. Maybe it was just his life experiences that made him feel this way, maybe it was something else. Either way, he wasn’t putting himself anywhere he couldn’t see outside. 

He sat down by the opening, settling into the most comfortable position he could find. 

“I won’t leave,” he whispered, his eyes never leaving Tiny Rey’s sleeping form. “I promise.”

* * *

Ben woke with a start. 

Something shifted next to him and he looked down to see Rey, adult Rey, folded in his arms. 

“Good morning,” she slurred. 

Ben took a deep breath, pressing a shaky kiss to her forehead. “Good morning.”

He slid his hands over her back, her arms, checking to make sure it was really  _ his  _ Rey. “I have a strange question to ask,” he muttered.

“I might have a strange answer,” Rey chuckled, still half asleep. 

“Where are we?”

“Um…” Rey hummed. “At home, I think. In our bed, probably. At least I hope so. That’s better than the floor would be.”

She was teasing him - she thought he was kidding. But when his fingers skimmed over the scar on her shoulder, he exhaled. He was home. Everything was okay. 

“Are you feeling well?”

This time, actual concern laced her words. He nodded. “Yeah. I’m okay,” he pulled her closer, kissing her lightly. “I had a dream last night. You were in it.”

“Oh,” she whispered. “I’m sorry, Ben, I didn’t know. I-”

“No, no, no,” he interrupted her. “Not like that. I’m sorry, I didn’t make that very clear. You were okay. I was okay. It wasn’t a nightmare, necessarily. It was just...strange.”

“I had a strange dream about  _ you  _ last night.”

There was an odd sort of silence for a moment. 

“I’m sure it was just a coincidence,” Rey chimed when the silence had stretched too long. 

“Probably.”

“Do you want to talk about your dream?”

Did he? It hadn’t been  _ bad,  _ no, but it was definitely something he needed to process somehow. 

“Maybe later. You?”

She sighed contentedly, nuzzling his neck with her nose as she scooted closer. “Maybe later. I just want to lie here for a little while.”

Ben planted another kiss in her hair. “That sounds just fine to me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Like I said, there might be a part two to this, but probably not for awhile. I hope you all enjoyed!
> 
> Until next time!


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